Jenny from pregnant yoga class has the big preg hungries. She has huge cravings for broccoli and spicy vege chorizo burritos and scarfs them down before we begin our limber stretches. When we get down in the cat position, Jenny humbly nails out these labor inducing farts from her lower chakra. Mary was coming out of Cobra pose and got whiff and tumbled back into hunch backed dog and squirted out a female. The newbie is okay cuz she landed on a mat. But, lordy she did look funny sliding across the vinyl flying a placenta balloon in her own version of the labor day parade.
The baby later went into One-Legged King Pigeon pose and cried an OM signifying his upper chakra was full of spitum. A couple of back pats on the newbie against my shoulder and my leotard was drenched in chorizo smelling goop.
CAUTION:
If giving birth in yoga class please make sure you are wearing a crotch-less leotard. If not the precious could end up balled up in childs pose against your bottom chakra kahn. (see above illustration)
his - The female sprung a chorizo turning it into a male! His mother tasted it and confirmed that it too was spicy and vege. She realized she tasted it in public and felt mass shame. Her embarrassment made her humbly spit up chorizo on her leotard.
Lesson: Yoga posing as a dog will make you act like one. Or, chorizo is the essence of life if it is vegan and spicy.
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